15 Team Battle Royal – **
-Nothing bad, just not that great. Cool to see the Road Warriors come back and take this BR though.

Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila  (LHW Title) – *1/2
-Aguila was extremely botchy in this match. Nothing felt natural. He looked rushed and his strikes were horrible. They looked like baby taps. Nothing more than a poorly execute spotfest.

HHH vs. Owen Hart (European Title) – ***
-The finish was very well executed with Chyna blinding Slaughter and low blowing Owen. THIS is how you book a heel faction.

Mero/Sable vs. Goldust/Luna – **1/4
-No one can deny how prominent the Mero/Sable saga was during this time and surprisingly enough Sable actually MADE this match for me. She did light years better than I thought she would and after being delayed the opportunity to get in there and kick some Luna ass she finally got it and went HAM. Thought she’d be ready to end it after the powerbomb, but went for a TKO. Well done. Hats of to Sable.

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock  (IC title) – *1/2

-It’s not that it was a bad match, it’s the fact it didn’t even last 5 minutes and then Shamrock’s win is voided by a technicality. The best thing to come from all this is Rock’s excommunication from The Nation by Farooq.

Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie vs. New Age Outlaws (Dumpster Match/Tag titles) – **1/4
-Rather slow and uneventful until the later parts. Thought the finish was pretty unorthodox, but I still liked it.

Undertaker vs. Kane – **3/4
-LOVED the build in this feud, but the match failed to live up to the hype. The latter half was where things picked up with the great dive to the outside by Taker and side step by Kane sending Taker through the table. Kane no sold like hell though. I understand he was booked to be untouchable in this match, which is why he was on offense for 90% of it, but there was a leg drop by Taker after a tombstone that Kane just took. Didn’t even flinch. Nothing that would ruin the match though. Thought the three tombstone finish to put Kane away was kind of anti-climatic, but it made sense.

Stone Cold Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels  (WWE Title) – ***3/4
-Well paced, intense brawling executed spectacularly. Match started off with a quick and ruthless pace for roughly 10 minutes before it slowed down. I love when guys come out swinging with all they have. Things slowed down, HBK went on the offensive, strategically working the left leg. Austin got in bits of offense here and there, but Shawn had him until he tuned up the band. Austin reversed the superkick, Shawn reversed the stunner, Austin reversed another superkick, and then finally STUNNER! 1-2-3 – Attitude Era bEG1ns!!

Average, but fun card.

Wrestlemania 14 – **1/2


Again, late, but here it is.

Sheamus/Bryan – MINUS FIVE STARS!

– Really pissed me off to have the WHC match go 18 seconds. It’s an even bigger embarrassment than Chavo’s loss to Kane at WM24 for the ECW title because the WHC is a main event title. It just goes to show how badly WWE needs to go back to a one brand company because it’s clear they don’t give a fuck about half of them. Still, the match had no build to it anyway so it fits.

Kane/Orton – **3/4

-Solid match. Nothing groundbreaking, but for 11 minutes it was pretty damn good. The finish shocked me, but looking at it now I know why they did it and it makes sense.

Big Show/Rhodes – **1/4

-On the one hand I wanted this match to go longer because I genuinely liked the feud, especially Cody’s work, but I understand why it only went 5 minutes. It was nothing more than a filler feud, but it was actually good and I was looking forward to this. Cody took some punishment from those giant chops from Show so I give him props from that. They did what they could with what they had.

Divas Match – Didn’t give one fuck. “Check your skidmarks” chant was the best thing about the match.

Taker/HHH – ****3/4

This is where things really started to feel like ‘Mania. AWESOME match. Taker took unbelievable amounts of punishment from those chairs. His entire upper back was black and blue and yet he was still able to dash around the ring for those offensive runs. Emotion poured out of all three men, Shawn especially. Him and HHH were dumbfounded at Taker’s resilience. I loved it. The ring steps spot was brutal and the Sweet Chin Music/Pedigree spot was ridiculous. We were all jumping out of our seats when it happened, but Taker still kicked out. The ending was great and Taker goes 20-0. We saw glimpses of Shawn turning on HHH AND working against Taker. Ref bumps were fantastic for the lulz and everything just worked. Classic near falls, choreography, bumps, endurance, and emotion. If they had used the cell more it would have been perfect, but nonetheless a fantastic match.

12 Man Tag Match – Not really rating worthy…that and I forgot the entire match. Just a crowd cooler for the double main event. Pretty standard.

Punk/Jericho – ****1/4

Before rewatching it, I walked away with feeling as though it was a rather boring match. Nothing 4 star worthy at all, but then after watching it a second time, it was an awesome match. Back and forth swings of momentum and offense alike, great intensity, Jericho talking shit, and a fantastic finish. I mean the finish really made this match. Back and forth into submissions and pins really worked the crowd until Jericho attempted a Walls of Jericho which Punk then reversed into an Anaconda Vice. Jericho waited for the crowd to peak and right before it would begin to fall, he tapped. Great match.

Rock/Cena – ****1/4

Now I think that Punk/Jericho was the better match, but Rock/Cena get the same rating only because of the crowd, the finish, the stage it was on, and obviously The Rock. The match was nothing special. For this grand finale a year in the making with hype video after hype video and video special after video promo after rap battle after Rock concert after Twitter fights, it fell short. It wasn’t Rock/Hogan. It was…ehh. Don’t get me wrong, definitely a good match, but the middle portions of the match were really slow and for all the hype it got, it didn’t feel like either man REALLY wanted it. It never got to the point where either man had to REALLY push through to get the victory. It just sorta happened. I liked the finish and the crowd went APESHIT. I mean they panned out from the hard camera and you can see EVERY SINGLE FAN with their arms in the air jumping around with lights flashing and everyone screaming. It truly was a sight to behold, but I feel like it fell short.

Wrestlemania 28 – ***3/4

A strong show that had a lot of potential, but fell short. Everyone will look back and remember this as a great Wrestlemania because of Rock/Cena, but objectively speaking it looked better on paper. If Sheamus/Bryan had actually been given time it would have been better, but still better than 25-27. LOADS better. I was actually pleased after watching Wrestlemania for the first time in 4 years.

I’m a little late, but just haven’t gotten around to this yet.  Gonna make this quick.

Kane/Orton – ***1/4
Fantastic match, well paced, made use of the stip, a great near fall after the chokeslam from Kane, and a fun finish that I personally enjoyed.

Clay/Ziggler – **
Why are we wasting Ziggler like this?

Show/Rhodes – **3/4
The finish protects Show and gets Cody his momemtum back while building heat at the same time. Well done.

Bryan/Sheamus – ****
Slow start, but strong finish. Every fall was done in a way to protect the other guy. Both men looked good.

Ryback squash – unrated

Punk/Jericho – ****1/2
Great match with loads of awesome spots. Punk was in top form tonight. Just worked so well.

Divas – **
Layla looks really good and not just from a beauty aspect.

Cena/Lesnar – ****1/2
INSANE match even after having the decision and major spots spoiled for me. Cena took an ass beating. I still believe there was a small portion of shoot fighting amongst that. Small instances, but still. Very convincing and brutal match. Loved it.

Fave matches in order – 1. Punk/Jericho 2. Orton/Kane 3. Cena/Lesnar

Extreme Rules 2012 – ****

So after a long 8 months break I finally decided to start doing this again. I’ve had a renewed passion for wrestling recently and have wanted to get back into. I’ve never stopped watching, just stopped writing and so I’ve decided to come back with a review of last night’s Monday Night Raw!

Tonight’s Raw was rather…blasé to say the least. There were some good things, but also a lot of bad things and I feel as though the bad things really weighed down the show. We kicked off the show with what we thought to be a contract signing between Cena and Lesnar, but Lesnar didn’t show as he hadn’t arrived yet and so Laurinaitis comes out to order Teddy to order Cena to leave the ring after which he attempted to carry on about his “People Power” shtick, but was cut off by a shocking, yet abundantly welcome Edge cameo and when I say welcome I mean, WELCOME. Edge had the biggest pop I’ve hear in a long while and easily the pop of the night. It’s insanse just how much more appreciate he is by the WWE crowds since his retirement. If you go back to Summerslam when he made an appearance for Christian you’ll find his pop there was equally as impressive, but I think tonight’s was louder. Anyway, Edge came to the ring and delivered a mind blowing promo. Intensity, attitude, facial expressions, emotion, authenticity; he had it all. It really makes you miss Edge even more. The man hasn’t missed a beat while we’ve been missing him a ton. It was a fantastic promo that I feel is a great addition to the development of Cena’s character as he tries to gather and regroup himself in time for Lesnar at Extreme Rules after a  heartbreaking loss at Wrestlemania. It added that sense of desparation in Cena. A really good way to start the show.

Besides Jericho/Kingston and Sheamus/Henry the in-ring action tonight was horrendus.  Jericho followed up a solid match with a very strong promo and left the scene looking good for Extreme Rules; mission accomplished. Bryan came away from reffing the Sheamus/Henry match looking very good; mission accomplished. However, that’s where the pros end and the cons begin. Cody should win come Extreme Rules, but I don’t know if it will happen. How much gas does this feud between him and Show really have? I thought their buildup to Wrestlemania was very good. Cody was putting in his best mic and promo work ever. It was really good. Show winning at ‘Mania was massively short-sighted. Sure, it gives the fans and Show a feel good moment and extends this feud onto the following PPV, but Show is 40. Cody is 26. Who really needs their Wrestlemania moment more? If Rhodes won he would have added more legitimacy to an already fantastic, record breaking pace IC title reign and would continue his white hot streak in the company as he’s been the only guy booked consistently well for any period of time besides Punk and Cena. Why kill his momentum just for him to pick the title back up at Extreme Rules IF he picks it back up at Extreme Rules? It doesn’t make sense. Then of course there are the Tag and Divas division match. The Divas are so irrelevant right now it’s insane. They didn’t even have a match last week in London and not a single fuck was given. I hadn’t even noticed until someone online pointed it out. It’s sad yet I couldn’t care less because every diva on the roster with the exception of Eve, Nattie, Beth, and to a lesser extent AJ are talentless, vanilla barbies. It’s rage inducing. Then the tag teams division; poor Epico and Primo. They should be feuding with the Usos. Assign Tamina back to managing the Usos and it’s perfect. They don’t need to cut amazing promos. Both teams are capable of putting on show stopping matches if given the time and opportunity. Let Rosa work the mic for Primo and Epico and Tamina for the Usos. She’s not the greatest talker, but she’s something. The Usos have the charisma to back her up. However, instead of that we get the comdedy team of Santino and Ryder and while both are well over with the fans, neither has a place in this match or anywhere for that matter. Ryder’s been kind of irrelebant since he was taken out by Kane and Santino has a match against Miz Sunday. Why no hype for that? Why can’t we have mid-card feuds? Where was Miz this week? Why is their match not even on PPV, but being streamed on Youtube as part of the pre-show? It’s sad.

The Jericho/Punk saga continues and I’m still enjoying the ride. Some criticize tonight’s sobriety test segment for not using the breathelizer which I can understand, but understand that Punk was faking the entire time to give Jericho a false sense of security. Using the breathelizer renders the entire segment and multiple segments prior (you know Punk showing his “gift” off the Matthews, Jericho and Riley finding Punk “drunk”, Jericho reporting to Eve and Johnny Ace of Punk’s drinking, and I can’t recall if it was Johnny Ace or Teddy ordering Punk to the ring for the test…but that too) useless and a waste of time. The segment was good though. Punk plays an okay drunk for someone who’s never been drunk before. Some of it was hard to watch, but the “drunk” talk was hilarious. “You’re not…you’re not even cool” – lmao. The real gold here is Punk’s second attemp in which he passes with flying colors and also showing of a little Ric Flair impersonation. That’s why I love Punk. It was followed by Punk beating down Jericho and chasing him out of ringside. Both men look good going into Extreme Rules and I’m still loving this feud.

Orton/Kane finally gets some substance. I thought Kane’s promo was kind of generic hooplah until after Orton rolled Bearer into the ice locker. Chilling remarks from Kane. It was furthered by Kane feining the retrieval of his father. Kane’s starting to look strong. I like it.

Then…there was Lesnar. Good God Vince keep this man off the mic. Lesnar his beyond bad on the stick. Heath Slater is more convincing and I mean that. Seriously, I MEAN THAT. He stumbled over words, repeated himself, became very redundant and boring. Lesnar has a lot of charisma when he doesn’t speak and he’s money in the ring…at least he was money in the ring. When it comes to anything athletic and having “the look” he’s your man, but without Heyman as a mouthpiece he fails miserably. Lesnar had all the credibility in the world before tonight. WWE even hyped the man like he was Rock going into Mania the entire night with video package after highlight after video package. They also outnumbered the good. Lesnar assualting Matthews was crazy. Completely caught me off guard. Lesnar was golden until he spoke tonight. I was actually dying for Cena to come out. Cena feels like Austin on the mic compared to Lesnar, but when he finally got down there, he said nothing. Cena had his trademark “lock chain” of old so maybe Edge talked some sense into him? Interesting. Anyway, the confrontation between Cena and Lesnar was intense, but it was completely underhwhelmed by Lesnar’s promo and left me feeling robbed of my time. Not like I have much else to do on a Monday Night anyway, but you get the point. The feud lost some steam tonight. This was the match I was anticipating the most going into Extreme Rules, but that now has shifted to Punk/Jericho.

Tonight’s Raw was less than average. It’s high points were high, but it’s low points were low, really low. It was a two hour show stretched into three simply for some Lesnar hype promos which were completely undone by his shit promo to close the show. If they kept this a two hour Raw and kept Lesnar from talking, it would have been a much better show, but they just stretched an already thin roster even thinner and showed us exactly why ratings suffer.

Monday Night Raw 4/23/12 – 5/10

Raw Review – 8/23/11

Posted: August 23, 2011 in 2011
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Okay so normally I would go through and review the show from start to finish in chronological order analyzing each match, segment, and every thing else with great detail, pretty much giving you a mental picture of how it went down. However, I’m just not really in the mood to write right now so I’m not going to go too into detail about anything that isn’t really interesting to me. If you didn’t see the show, watch it because I’m not going to be real vivid like usual. That being said, let’s get started.

The ADR/Cena/Punk/Trips segment that started the show was okay. It was basically Cena telling ADR that he was a coward and would whip his ass at NOC, Cena and Punk fighting over who got their rematch first, and Trips announcing Cena/Punk for the main event to determine who was the #1 contender for NOC. Not the best mic work by Punk, but Cena shined tonight and gave me a reason to appreciate him, a little, again.

Later on we had a match between Swagger and Riley and though I don’t care for Swagger at all and have lost my interest for Riley ever since his feud with Miz died, I found what happened during the match interesting. Ziggler came out and was arguing with Vickie about her taking on Swagger as another client and somehow he accidentally knocked Vickie over. That led to Swagger coming out of the ring and arguing with Dolph before shoving him. Of course, as soon as Swagger hit the ring once again A-Ry got him in a roll up and won. Swagger’s a joke, yes, but it seems like we could have an actual secondary storyline on Raw and motherfucking Jack Swagger is all of a sudden in the title picture. How about that?

The segment between Trips, Nash, and Punk was good. Punk, of course, got a huge ovation and crowd chants. Punk said he was a line crosser and all this other shtuff and eventually said he’s tired of talking and went to assault Nash, but Trips held him back. Punk tells HHH to get his hands off him and eventually gets into it with him. Punk jokes that Triple H keeps his cell phone and his balls in Stephanie’s purse. Out of nowhere Nash decks Punk with a right hand. Then HHH takes Nash up the ramp and to the back with anger and Punk just laughs it off in the ring as the crowd chants his name. I’ll talk more about this later.

And then after Bourne and Kofi became tag champions, Miz and R-Truth had the greatest promo of all time. If you didn’t see it…


Miz: “What? What? What? You sound like a bunch of ducks!” Between that, Miz “talking real slow so you can understand” part, and Truth’s freestyling at the end I was dying from laughter. Truly the highlight of the night and yes I’m saying that even with the developments in the main storyline. They really made some good points, both spoke very well, great crowd interaction and I mean GREAT, and they drew a helluva lot of heat. Canada is usually a great crowd anyway, but if these two can draw heat like that everywhere, I’ll start being more interested in them than Punk/Cena. Great promo.

Now on to Punk/Cena. Their match tonight was good. Obviously not as good as their PPV matches, but that’s to be expected. It ultimately resulted in Nash coming down to the ring and distracting Punk so Cena could hit the AA and eventually win, which he did. If you didn’t know, Trips was told by John Laurinitis that Nash had been in a car crash and Trips went to the hospital to check on him thus leaving JL in charge. As we now know, that wasn’t true and all this unfolded. Could Nash and JL be in on this together? Is Trips involved but wants to look innocent? Who knows. Cena winning tonight was predictable and honestly was for the better. They want to give ADR a nice push and Cena is the guy they’ll need to do that. Plus it allows Punk/Trips/Nash to continue which will probably go on for months and months possibly into Wrestlemania 28. It’ll be interesting to see what Punk and Trips have to say about this next week and Scott Hall was expected to return tonight, but he didn’t so he may be back next week if he does come back at all. It is just a rumor. I don’t know though, this Raw just didn’t leave me wanting more like the ones building into MITB and SS did. It seems like things have died down since SS. Maybe things will pick back up, I don’t know. But ADR assaulting Cena to end Raw just sucked. Personally, I would have liked Cena to go over Punk with some other possible interference, possibly JL, so he doesn’t look too weak and then end Raw with Trips “visiting” the hospital Nash was said to be at, but he instead gets ambushed by Nash and Hall. Kind of an Outsiders reunion to overtake Trips with the help of JL. Kind of like a reformation of the nWo. I don’t know, but it would have been better than this crap. Tell me what you thought in the comments below and remember to rate this blog. Peace out guys.

Teddy Long kicked off this week’s Smackdown! introducing the new World Heavyweight Champion Randy Orton and announcing a 20 man over the top rope battle royal to determine the new #1 contender. I was actually surprised that Teddy made an announcement that I was excited about. Oh and Orton cut a promo as well…telling us his name was Randy Orton…exhilarating. Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase came out after Orton’s promo to confront him and damn was I impressed by Cody’s mic work. He’s really coming into his own and I could see him as a top talent. If you didn’t see the promo or need a refresher here you go…(right around the 5:48 mark)

You can thank me later. His mic work is fantastic. Emotion, facial expressions, tone of voice, vocabulary, etc. For the longest time I never saw him as a main event guy, but he could be. You have to wonder though, how long can he keep this mask gimmick up until it gets stale, what will he do after that, and will it work? I don’t know, but what he’s doing now is fantastic. I’m hoping he does a program with Orton down the line. They have quite the history together so it could be interesting. Oh and Orton buried Ted…not that anyone cares, but I just find it laughable how badly Ted has been buried since his departure from Legacy.

Cody and Zeke had a match for the IC title. Hopefully that takes care of their mini feud. I really don’t want to see Cody carry every last pound of Zeke through every promo and match for weeks on end. Maybe we could see Sheamus/Rhodes starting next week. I’d love to see that. Anyways, this match was nothing to scream about, but of course Rhodes retained. I’m loving his reign already and it’s only been a week. I’m going to have fun watching him hold the title.

We then go to a Ryder/Long segment where Zack said he was going to win the battle royal and it was announced that the Undisputed WWE Champion had been invited to Smackdown!. Aksana then entered the shot and Zack walked off to leave Long and Aksana alone in the process giving Teddy a vote of confidence which made me lol. Aksana….God only knows how much I’ve adored your gimmick change. Her sexual innuendos towards Teddy which seem to be a “result of her poor English” are extremely entertaining to watch. These segments between Long and Aksana have been awesome and extremely edgy and I’m loving WWE’s move back towards more adult oriented content. Here’s the segment…(starts around 5:25 or 6:25, I can’t remember)

We then had Gabriel/Kidd which drew zero interest from me. Can’t remember the match though. Afterwards, ADR came out and did the same promo and repeated himself for the 100th time. He then issued an open challenge and Daniel Bryan came out and accepted. I didn’t watch the match as I was preoccupied, but I heard good things. I did, however, enjoy Booker owning Cole before ADR’s promo, made me lol. Starts around 3:48 or so…

We then had a tag match between Kelly Kelly/AJ and Nattie/Alicia Fox. Barring Kelly’s and Alicia’s ring work, it was an awesome match. I’m loving the push the Divas’ division is getting with more ring time. AJ and Nattie worked well together and I love seeing the Divas with actual talent get more time on TV. AJ and Kelly went over, or won if you aren’t familiar with wrestling speak, and Nattie attacked Alicia afterwards for being pinned by Kelly thus further cementing her agenda against the “barbie doll” Divas. This may lead to a face turn by Alicia, again if you have no clue what I’m saying brush up on your wrestling terms, Wikipedia is a good place to do so, but I’m not sure.

I’m reading the spoilers for this week’s show as a refresher and it says the battle royal was next, but I feel like there was something else. There were a few backstage interviews and SummerSlam Axxess promos so I guess that’s it. Anyways, the battle royal was okay. No noteworthy spots. I was pissed off Barrett didn’t win, but I expected Henry to win. Makes the most sense since he’s torn through everyone else. The thing I was most upset about was instead of the final two being Sheamus/Henry it was Sin Cara/Henry(the final four were Sheamus, Henry, Barrett, and Sin Cara). It would have made sense given their history, but of course the go with the worn out David v. Goliath bullshit. Though I suppose it was for the best. Why have Sheamus put Henry over again? He didn’t lose clean at SummerSlam and Henry didn’t eliminate him for the win during the battle royal so he hasn’t really been buried at all which is good.

So that was pretty much it. Good Smackdown!, but I didn’t appreciate the ring work with the exception of the Divas’ match which is crazy to even fathom that being the case. Though I suppose if I had watched it, Bryan/Barrett would have been cool. Looking forward to next week and that’s all that matters. Tell me what you thought of the show in the comments and I haven’t asked this yet, but subscribe to the blog if you want. I didn’t even know you could until just before writing this entry. Other than that, take it easy guys.

Summerslam 2003 Poster

From this review forward I’m going to be centering all everything rather than just the matches. Looks more organized. I’ll also be adding in a picture to lead off each review and maybe some throughout the post. I think it’ll spice things up. Just a heads up.

La Resistance v. The Dudley Boyz – World Tag Team Title Match

We’re so used to seeing high flying, high impact thrillers from the Dudleyz, but this match just wasn’t that. Given, it wasn’t a stipulation match so it obviously wasn’t going to be epic, but it still had a chance to open the show well. However, it just didn’t. The majority of the match felt boring and flat. Nothing really stuck out and Rene Dupree selling every move like shit didn’t help. He literally took a punch and then took the stiffest back bump I’ve ever seen on a second and a half delay. It was just painful to watch and Grenier wasn’t much better. It wasn’t until the last 2-3 minutes or so where we saw something good. Bubba got D-Von riled up and hit a 3D on Dupree. Just as the ref was about to hit the three count Grenier pulls the ref out of the ring and distracts him while Rob Conway, then known as just the service man or Marine from the crowd, dressed as a camera hit D-Von with a camera which allows Dupree to pick up the win. Boring match, but a clever finish. – **3/4

Undertaker v. A-Train w/ Sable

I like this match, I really do. Taker went above and beyond to sell his rib injury even with the smallest things. He sold i extremely well which is one reason why I like this match. Taker was on the receiving end of a lot of punishment as A-Train focused on the ribs. Taker would mount a comeback with his patented Old School maneuver. A-Train would get a few chair shots in, as the ref took a bump earlier, but Taker would eventually stick the boot right through the chair sending it back into A-Train’s face. It eventually led to A-Train reversing a Last Ride and a Tombstone until Taker finally got him in a chokeslam and secured a pinfall. Taker was going to continue his assault on A-Train but Sable stepped in, still looking as fine as ever, and tried to seduce him but to no avail. Before Taker could chokeslam her Stephanie McMahon’s music hits and she hits the ring to exact revenge on Sable for A-Train injuring her a month earlier at Vengeance. Steph pounded on Sable for a while until A-Train pulled her away and that was pretty much it. Solid match with a great finish. Loved the way Taker refused Sable whoring herself upon him, kayfabe wise of course. – ***1/4

Shane McMahon v. Eric Bishoff

I won’t recap the whole storyline, but it sure as hell was heated. Bischoff, supposedly, slept with Shane’s mother and the promos for that by the way are just plain wrong. Shane came to the ring ready to fight and he did for the first few minutes. He dominated Bischoff as expected, but it didn’t take long for something shady to go down to aid Bischoff. What was that shady thing you ask? Just Coach hitting Shane with a steel chair. The ref tried to DQ Bischoff, but he announced that it was now a no DQ match and falls count anywhere. They would gang up on Shane until Austin intervened. Bischoff and Shane were both down so Coach had a standoff with Austin, but Austin couldn’t lay hands on Coach unless physically proved by Coach. Shane cleverly pushed Bischoff into Austin which allowed Austin to go on the attack and pretty much annihilate Coach. Austin stunned both Bischoff and Coach. Mind you amidst all this chaos the match was still in progress. Shane would then go on to put Bischoff through the Spanish announcers table with a Leap of Faith and because it was falls count anywhere, got the pinfall. Austin and Shane would then celebrate with beer and Bischoff for no apparent reason bladed when his head took no severe damage from the table bump. This match was just bound to be a clusterfuck due to Bischoff not even being a real competitor. You knew something was going to go down and it sure as hell did, in a bad way. The match wasn’t much of a match and was rather boring until Coach interfered. Then, it was just a matter of time before Austin came out and Shane won. Rule changes and interferences just made the match a clusterfuck. It really just ended up being one big stunt. Bischoff should have had someone take his spot and wrestle for him and if his guy lost Bischoff would face some punishment, but that’s not what happened. It was more of a big spectacle if anything, but not even Austin could save this. – **1/2

Eddie Guerrero v. Chris Benoit v. Rhyno v. Tajiri – US Title Match

Four pretty good if not great ring workers in the ring during this one. Benoit’s wrestling was dead on during this one and he was really the highlight of the match. Loved the Three Amigos spot and the Tarantula Submission which I’ve never seen before I saw this match. It looked fucking sick. It’s no wonder why Benoit is one of the all time greats. Overall the match was pretty good. Didn’t see one botch and for a fatal four-way it was really well organized and under control. There was never too much going on. Great ring work by all. The submission standoff between Eddie and Benoit was gold and I loved every second of it. Really liked this match and as of right now, my favorite fatal four-way. Eddie retained in a quick pinfall victory after Benoit took, I believe, Rhyno out to the outside. Great match. – ***3/4

Kurt Angle v. Brock Lesnar – WWE Title Match

Such a great match. Started off with quick and swift chain wrestling. Both men would have short bursts of offense before the other regained control. There was a roller coaster of momentum and emotion. It was just a really technically sound wrestling match and I think Lesnar’s wrestling ability was completely overshadowed by his look and sheer dominance, but he and Kurt put on a wrestling clinic in this match. I don’t know if this surpasses their Wrestlemania 19 match as it’s been a while since I saw it, but it sure as hell was great. Vince got involved and hit Kurt with a steel chair while the ref was out which allowed Brock to hit an F5. After Kurt kicked out of the pin, Lesnar went for another F5 but Kurt countered it into an Angle Lock. Lesnar would grab three of the four ropes, but Kurt would pull away each time and Lesnar eventually tapped. Such a great finish and there were some good false finishes in there as well. Great build with a great heel turn leading into a great match. – ****1/2

Rob Van Dam v. Kane – No Holds Barred Match

This match was nothing special. Just the usual cool down match between main events. It was still a good time killer. There were parts of the match though that felt slow and boring, mainly the action outside of the ring. The last 4-5 minutes or so are pretty good so that saved it from being a total buzzkill. – ***

Triple H v. Randy Orton v. Chris Jericho v. Goldberg v. Shawn Michaels v. Kevin Nash – Elimination Chamber Match for the World Heavyweight Championship

Elimination Chamber Preview

Well, it was a good day to be a Goldberg mark I suppose. See, I normally like Elimination Chamber matches. I like the concept and it’s one of my favorite match types, but this is by far the worst Chamber match I’ve seen. It started out well it HBK and Jericho going one on one. No real surprise there. Orton was the first to be released from the pods. He didn’t really cause much of a stir mainly because no one cared for him at the time, but that’s a different story. Then Nash comes in, goes on an offensive assault and then is eliminated two and a half minutes after he entered. Okay, short and quick elimination. I guess I’ll let it slide besides, he did destroy everyone before he left, lolz. Trips is next to enter, but as soon as his chamber door opens HBK super kicks him and Hunter goes into oversell mode for like ten minutes for the finish of the match, but I’ll get to that in a second. Goldberg is obviously last to enter and by God I could have waited another three minutes. He comes in and wrecks everyone. Spears Orton, eliminates him. Then spears Jericho through a chamber pod. HBK gets a few punches in, but good ol’ Bergie goes back to the offensive and goes right through Michaels. If I remember correctly, Jericho is eliminated first followed by Michaels not even two minutes later. So, in about five minutes, Goldberg enters the match and buried two future HOF’ers and the future of the company. Good job there Bergie. Then, it’s onto Trips who has been watching Goldberg destroy everyone. Flair tries to keep Goldberg out by holding the door shut and at one point was doing it by laying on the barricade with his feet on the door, major lol moment there. But, eventually Goldberg broke through the cage and started to assault Trips. It wasn’t long before they were back in the ring, I’d say about 90 seconds but it’s anyone’s guess. Goldberg lines up a spear on Trips, but Flair had handed him a sledgehammer through the cage and Hunter struck Goldberg with the sledge in mid spear. Then…Trips secures the pinfall and retains.

What a load of shit. Goldberg fucking decimated three men in roughly five minutes and is beaten by one shot from the sledge? On top of that, Trips barely took any damage himself. One Sweet Chin Music and a few punches from Goldberg. That’s it. There wasn’t one false finish the entire match and not one reason to believe Trips was in danger of losing the title. The whole match was pointless. – **1/4

Overall, a terrible SummerSlam. Most likely not that worst, I haven’t seen every SummerSlam, but definitely got that good. The Fatal Fourway was cool and Taker/A-Train was cool for the undercard, but other than that Angle/Lesnar was the only great match on the card. Nothing else really stuck out. Thank God I didn’t have to sit through Zach Gowen/Matt Hardy. Just a poor SummerSlam.

SummerSlam 2003 – ***